Standup Comedy: A Case for Being Mindful

Be mindful of everything you do when you’re on stage performing; that’s the takeaway message of this post. The other week I went to a show to see a friend perform. Before him, another comic was performing, and he had a bit where he was impersonating a train conductor yelling at people.

Normally this would be fine. However, in his vigor, the comic forgot a phrase commonly heard among children: “Say it; don’t spray it!”

Picture of comic spitting on audience

The comic forgot a phrase commonly heard among children: “Say it; don’t spray it!”

I sat in the front right of the stage, and with the way the lighting was, I got to see the globs of moisture travel toward the couple sitting in the middle. The worst part about this wasn’t that the spit went toward the couple; it was that it landed right in their food.

I made eye contact with the guy of the couple, making a face and laughing. He made a similar face whilst laughing, so I assumed he knew the comic had seasoned his dinner with a “spice” no one wants to eat. But no, a minute later, this dude reaches over to take a bite out of his chicken. I wanted to say something, but I was frozen in horror. Meanwhile, the comic was making a joke about his gay brother, so I had had to hold in any wincing or gagging because I didn’t want to come across as homophobic.

By the end of the show, both the guy and the girl he was with had cleaned their plate of the chicken and the fries. Gross, right? Now they could have some sort of communicable disease or worse. So, if you need to raise your voice on stage, be mindful and take the necessary steps to prevent yourself from ruining someone’s food.

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2 thoughts on “Standup Comedy: A Case for Being Mindful

  1. Love it!! I lost my shit at “globs of moisture”. Which leads me to another question, how does one recover socially when their own ‘globs of moisture’ escape unbidden in the middle of a conversation.

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